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Has anyone ever given you an especially memorable compliment<\/a>? A few years ago, Joanna<\/a> told me I was \u201creally good at getting presents\u201d after I flipped out over a bottle of fancy rinse-free hand wash<\/a> that she gave me before a flight. That hand wash was<\/em> pretty great, but what really stuck with me was the compliment. Being good at receiving gifts? That\u2019s a really nice attribute to have. It\u2019s the kind of thing people always notice, but rarely mention \u2014 let alone compliment.<\/p>\n Most of the time, compliments<\/a> are reserved for things you can see: Nice haircut! Great outfit! You look so pretty!<\/em> Nothing wrong with that, but I do make a point of trying to offer compliments that aren\u2019t based in appearance. I do it, in part, because it aligns with my values<\/a> around body diversity and beauty standards. But also because non-physical compliments land differently, and seem to stick in a way that even the most effusive haircut compliment doesn\u2019t. It takes more consideration to comment on something you can\u2019t see at a glance, and I think our brains clock that effort. It makes the comment more meaningful \u2014\u00a0makes us feel \u201cseen,\u201d ironically.<\/p>\n Don\u2019t get me wrong, I\u2019ll take a compliment on my hair (thank you for noticing my bob<\/a>; I was super nervous about it). But my heart swells like the Grinch\u2019s when I think of the times someone\u2019s noticed, for example, that I\u2019m good at approaching animals or making young children feel comfortable. And years later, I still like thinking of myself as someone who\u2019s good at receiving gifts. It\u2019s a small thing, but a good thing, and something I\u2019d never have noticed about myself had someone not pointed it out. So when I notice a trait like that in others, I like to do the same.<\/p>\n How about you? Are there any non-physical compliments that have stuck with you over time? I love asking this question because the answers often surprise me!<\/strong><\/p>\n P.S. A tip for talking to strangers<\/a>, and what do you like about yourself? <\/a><\/p>\n (Photo from Friends<\/em>. \u201cToilet seat covers?!\u201d)<\/p>\n\n<\/blockquote>\n