The other day, one of my boys was heading out on a date (new parenting frontier!), and he asked me what he should do if there were an awkward silence. “It’s okay to be quiet sometimes,” I reassured him. “But you can always have some back-up questions ready, if you want.”
I remembered a funny This American Life episode, where people shared loaded questions they ask on first dates. Editor Emanuele Berry asks potential partners what they think of Beyoncé, since “it’s a question that tells you how they feel about a powerful Black woman.” Another woman challenges her dinner dates to name their favorite Tom Hanks movies; she says the question serves as a low-stakes personality test.
On a goofier note, this McSweeney’s middle-of-the-date questionnaire made me laugh out loud. (#3. When the bartender came over, did you put on a little voice, or do you just talk like that?) (#37. Did I take too long in the bathroom, or was it weirdly quick?)
And when we watched Love on the Spectrum, Tanner, a 20-something in South Carolina, asked his date rapid-fire questions about animals: “Do you like lizards?” “Do you like snakes?” “Do you like tortoises?” “Do you like frogs?” “Do you like toads?” “Do you like sharks?” “Do you like jellyfish?” “Do you like octopi?” “Do you like squid?” “Do you like whales?” The sweetest.
Of course, I ended up telling my son my own go-tos — on first dates, I’ve liked asking about favorite movies, sibling birth order, and irrational fears, since those topics often lead to funny stories. He took it all into consideration — and later that night returned home with the news that everything had gone very well. 🙂
What questions do you ask on first dates? And what dating advice do (or would) you give your kids??
P.S. My sister’s brilliant dating advice, five things that surprised me about divorce, and the sexiest podcast omggggg.
